So the question continues, how do we make positive change in our life?  Have you ever noticed that most of us are more interested in creating change in others than ourselves? We would like to suggest at this point that may want to get a bit self-centered at this point in our discussion.  Isn’t it amazing how many people around us need changing? However, for now let’s just focus on our own “missing pieces”. Discussion regarding change theory tends to focus on either changing our behavior or our inner dynamics. Some people prefer the gardening metaphor.  When weeds sprout up do we use the weed-eater to whack the pesky stems to the ground or dig up the root system? Of course fans of the chemical Roundup have a third option.

In a discussion about changing our own behavior, we would like to suggest the very first thing one needs to do is observe vital behavior. There are plenty of behaviors but many are not vital to living a productive life. It is our experience that most of us really do not see our own behaviors with clarity. After all, when someone gets upset isn’t it usually due to their need for anger management? They simply don’t understand us. The converse is also true. When we get upset with someone, it is because they have issues. While most of us believe we know how we come across with others, experience has taught us that the average person is in fact quite clueless. Most would agree that we all have blind spots – but that many? What is your experience?

 Here’s to Growth,Tim

So just when is an apple perfect? Most people would argue it is perfect when crisp and sweet (except for the Granny Smith lovers). Is it possible that an apple is perfect at every stage of development? After it becomes soft and brown. When it falls to the ground and rots it is doing just what nature would have it do in order to provide fertilizer for the seed to grow into a tree. Then after the tree grows and provides buds, it is perfect — for its stage. When the apple is green, hard and sour — it too is perfect.

We in Western Culture get caught up in thinking perfection is like a ladder. But as we know the higher we go, the more we slip down. Beyond that, there is no top, no place to stop and say we have achieved.

Perhaps we in the West would be better served to borrow some perspective from our friends from the East. Amazing to think that we ARE perfect — for our stage of development. Worms and all!

Live Well,

Tim

We all have behaviors which get in our way. That of course is the human condition. The question for many people is – how do we change non-productive behaviors into positive behaviors? Just how do we achieve positive change?

Transforming inefficient, non-productive, and even destructive behavior into positive, forward action performance is what The Center for Positive Change is about. Before I began working on my Ph.D. in psychology I remember wondering if it was more effective for change to come from outward modification of behavior or from the core of our inner being. Since the answer to that question would make a difference where I would do my graduate work I felt I needed an answer. Should I study behaviorism or psychodynamic theory?

We would love to know what your experience has been. How do you go about making personal and/or professional change? We are not as interested in hearing from differing schools of thought as much as hearing about your practical experiences. Let’s be pragmatic for awhile. How do you successfully make positive change in your life?

Here’s to Growth,

Tim